I Killed Myself

There be times that I lay myself to sleep,
Rest my eyes, and let my wounded heart bleed,
dream of things I did, of things of love too deep
That in spiral agony became a blur
And more wounds in my heart began to concieve.
"I saw thee crying on the wall, mending
The tears that shed my own, of my own in love.
I tried to reach thee half-awake, crying
as with one I clasped this wounded heart moved.
Then my legs turned numb, as you ran away
With a knight, striding golden steps with thee,
Leaving me in blight, crying my dismay.
And in time, I began to see that I
mattered but none to thee.
So I killed myself, for you did never see,
through my pains... not through your sympathy
How much you meant to me."

- February 19, 2006